There have been many issues in the news lately regarding our nation's educational system. I have always looked at teaching as an ideal career for myself, but with the regulations and new policies being implemented in the last decade, I am not so sure anymore. I know that people always been saying "well when I was younger" since the beginning of time, but I know that things have changed dramatically since I was a child.
My parents never negotiated with us when we were children, they never begged or pleaded with us to do what they told us. Punishments were actually punishments instead of a 30 second concern. While growing up, I do know that I hated our disciplines, but that is how it should be. We did receive spankings, had our mouths washed out with soap- both bar and liquid, bed without dinner, bed super early, time outs, etc... Today, so many people do not discipline their children- they have televisions in their bedrooms, multiple gaming systems, outrageous amounts of toys which maybe receive an hour of use before they want something else. This was not how I was raised. It was such an amazing day when we would get to pick out A new toy. Usually for me, it was Barbie, or Barbie clothing. At Christmas we did receive a few toys, but primarily we received practical gifts, like clothing, coats, shoes, etc... I know some women, and no offense to single moms by any means, who feel the need to buy their children (under the age of 3) $500 worth of TOYS for Christmas when they complain constantly that they are so broke. It seems to me that that much money for a 1-2 year old child is such a waste. They grow so quickly that they do not keep those toys for more than 3 months before they are already looking for something new.
Since most of my readers do have children, please tell me if this is not a ridiculous decision for people to make? I am not saying that it is all single mothers, but this is actually a specific example of one person that I know who literally spent that amount of money this year, as well as last year and the little boy doesn't turn 3 until June. I do know about wanting so spoil your children, A and I spoil our "surrogate baby" G and he is only 1 1/2 years old. He is the son of our best friends and we have enjoyed being able to spoil him, BUT we are not spending $500 for holidays/birthdays and neither are his parents.
Anyways, back to the educational system, although inter-familiar relationships does play a major part in how our schools are shaped. Children who have no responsibilities at home translate that behavior into their school life. The fact that students can no longer fail or receive a zero in school is only setting our children up for the idea that life has no set rules to follow. They do not have to do the work when it is required, but are constantly being given every opportunity to try again. I am not saying that people and children should be given one chance to do something and do it perfectly, but there has to be an accountability system established. Children are lazy when it comes to school work, this is nothing new. The issue comes from parents not forcing their children to do their work, not checking the work, or simply helping to the point of doing the work for the child.
My father was the worst (through the eyes of a child) person to ask for help on homework. I wanted him to simply tell me the answer and then move on. This was not how it worked in our house. If I asked him what 2x3 was, he would ask me what that meant, how would you solve it, how else can you write this, etc... I would have to teach him what I learned in school before he would "help" me. I realized later on that by making me "teach" him, I was reinforcing what I knew and could more easily solve the problem.
I took a break from writing this the other day, and last night on the way out to the lake with my father we discussed these issues that I've been having with the education system and parenting styles that we witness. He did make me realize something very important about parenting styles- they do not always effect children equally. My mother was the youngest of 4 children, one of which I never had the opportunity to know since he passed away 2 weeks before I turned 1. Although I never got to know my uncle, I've always heard that he and my mother were very similar in their personalities; very family-sentric. My mother was the most selfless person I know, everything she did was for the betterment of her family, friends, and especially through her work- complete strangers. Although they were all raised under the same roof, with the same expectations and disciplines, the differences between the four of those people could not be wider. Entitlement versus diligence, long term planning versus immediate gratification, strong family ties versus "fair weather friends" mentality. Its amazing that the similarities end so close to the top of the list of personal characteristics.
My parents worked for everything they received, even if others looked at them as being given handouts. Mowing my grandparents' lawn and doing work around their house to "pay" for all of their help. Its funny how much some of my mom's siblings thought that we were just given so much from my grandparents. I remember helping them out with gardening, cleaning, cooking, laundry, lawn work, etc... Thats what we did. It was never a chore to do it, thats how we were raised, to help other people out. I may have never cleaned my room voluntarily (or even very well involuntarily) but I was always willing to help my friends out cleaning their rooms- I'm still this way.
As if the universe KNEW I was writing this blog tonight... I received an email on facebook tonight epitomizing said differences among siblings. Beyond the passive aggressiveness of the email I really cannot figure out the point. And can someone please explain "yeowww!" to me. This was the subject and I don't know if it is a "meow" or what.
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